Mësimet Që Mora Nga Humbja E Tim Biri: Flutura Açka Mesazh Drithërues Për Vdekjen E Djalit Të Saj Të Vetëm…!

Pas ndarjes nga jeta e birit të vetëm, vjen me një mesazh rreqethës shkrimtarja Flutura Açka.
Teksa ka gjetur forcë të falenderojë gjithë ata që i janë gjendur pranë në këto ditë zije e dhimbjeje pa fund, ajo ndan me gjithë të njohurit e te panjohurit në rrjetin social ‘Facebook’, leksionin më të madh që i dha djali i saj.

“Si të gjesh tokën pas shtrëngatës në oqeanin e dhimbjes. “Mam, prova jote se më ke dashur vërtet, fillon tani. Nëse do të dish të vazhdosh. Bëj gjënë më të mirë që di të bësh! Shkruaj! Të shkruash është terapia jote. Bëje, Mam, mos hyr në spiralen e dhimbjes, atje humb.”

Postimi i Flutura Açkes
Miqtë e mi të vyer,
Ka ditë që përpiqem të formuloj disa rreshta falenderimi për ju, por e kam patur të vështirë të ulem e të shkruaj, edhe pse jam njeri i stërvitur me fjalën. Lebetia që kalova, dhe po kaloj, e ftoh njeriun me botën, e vetmon zemrën, por vala e dashurisë dhe e merakut njerëzor që më ka rrethuar këto ditë, më ka bërë të ndjej një prani të papërmastë në këtë humbje të madhe.

Nuk e kisha ditur se isha në mesin e një mbrojtjeje të tillë njerëzore, të cilën nga shkujdesja dhe nxiti i përditës, nuk kam mundur ta mas, as ta kuptoj si duhet. Në ditët e pikëllimit tim akut, kjo prani u shfaq me të gjithë peshën, shqetësimin dhe përkorien e vet. E tillë, si e askund.

Miq shumë të shtrenjtë të jetës sime, të afërm e familjarë të ngushtë, morën rrugët nëpër Europë të më ishin pranë këto ditë. Mijëra e mijëra e mijëra e mijëra mesazhe e telefonata, në të gjitha format që shpiku teknologjia, më kanë mbërritur, bashkë me lutjen që t’i ndjej se janë pranë meje.

Në të vërtetë, janë pranë meje, dhe unë lutem të gjej qetësinë e duhur që t’u përgjigjem e t’i falenderoj me po atë dashuri që më kanë shkruar dhe trajtuar humbjen time këto ditë. Lexues, miq që kam takuar në jetën time, qytetarë të thjeshtë që shpesh më kanë ndalur në rrugë, të panjohur të shumtë,

të njohur të largët, njerëz publikë me të cilët ende nuk kam mundur të pi një kafe, kolegë shkrimtarë dhe njerëz të kulturës shq iptare, dhe jo vetëm, të tjerë që më kanë ndjekur në qëndrimet e mia publike, miq të tjerë, mesazh et e të cilëve më kanë humbur nëpër rrjetet sociale, kanë ndarë me mua diçka nga pesha e këtyre ditëve, më të rendat e jetës sime. Secilit prej tyre, më vete, i përcjell falenderimin tim dhe mirënjohjen e thellë, duke ururar të dëgjoj vetëm lajme të gëzuara për secilin prej tyre.

Dikur, diku, kam lexuar se e vetmja gjë tërësisht e jona, është e shkuara. Por im Bir nuk është e shkuara ime, ai është vetë jeta ime. Me këtë ikje të parakohshme, im Bir më rindërtoi si njeri, më mësoi si të fal edhe të pafalshmen, më la të kuptoj se nuk mjafton vetëm të jetosh me dinjitet, por të ikësh nga kjo jetë po aq dinjitetshëm, dhe të përpiqesh të kurosh edhe në ikje e sipër, plagët e parakohshm e të qenieve të dashura pranë teje.

Një djalosh i hapur ndaj botës së madhe prej studimeve ndërkombëtare, një europian fanatik dhe fantastik, një holandez i paqtë, feja e të cilit ishin ligji dhe liria, një shqiptar krenar deri në mrekullim, im Bir më dha leksonin më të çuditshëm dhe më të rëndësishëm të jetës sime: Si të gjesh tokën pas shtrëngatës në oqeanin e dhimbjes. “Mam, prova jote se më ke dashur vërtet, fillon tani. Nëse do të dish të vazhdosh. Bëj gjënë më të mirë që di të bësh! Shkruaj! Të shkruash është terapia jote. Bëje, Mam, mos hyr në spiralen e dhimbjes, atje humb.”

Tani jam e tronditur dhe nën tundimin për ta përbirë brenda meje këtë dhimbje, por kur ju mendoj juve, aq dashuri që më rrethon, trandem dhe kujtohem për kahjen kah duhet ecur.
Fli, Bir, jam mirë! Çfarëdo jete që të kem, ditët e mia të jetës do të jenë gjithnjë më pak se falenderimet që kam marrë prej teje. Ti ishte prej atyre që dite të më pasurosh edhe me ikjen tënde, ti vije, dhe vjen ende, era Njeri!


Comments

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